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National ACEs Program...Educate, Inspire & Change!

What a great thread of responses I received from around the country about a National Mandate for ACE Testing parents who show up for pre and post natal appointments.  Yet, somehow we need to take this subject to another level eh?

For all of us who understand the significance of ACEs...most of us are ready to climb to the highest point and start SCREAMING about the subject.  It clearly affects how you look at the world differently.  ACEs impact schools, churches, corporations, associations, hospitals, etc.  I have NEVER had a discussion about ACEs and been rebuffed...it all makes such dramatic and pragmatic sense to every person I have talked with.  Now the question I pose is this...HOW, WHERE and WHEN do we amplify our message?

Jane Stevens pointed out that someone said how valuable it would be to have parents...before each school year...take the ACE Test.  Every teacher I have talked with about ACEs is thrilled with the idea.  I have been proposing it in my talks as a parental Report Card.  EVERY teacher knows who is getting help at home very quickly each year.

I'm just starting to meet with corporations that are finally acknowledging that  employees with ACEs are most likely the ones who are sick more often and miss work related to depression,etc.  The Fortune 100 best places to work list ALWAYS include the feeling that they are family...at work.  So many people are lacking the connection to a functional family that they are loyal to their core because of the way they are treated.

Slowly, hospitals around the country are seeing the value of helping their own employees with ACE issues.  Yet, the world of doctors seem to be very slow to accept the simplicity of our core issues.  I remember watching a speech gave in Aspen years ago where he talked about making a presentation to the doctors at Kaiser Permanente...I think...and offered to take any and all of them to lunch to talk further about the subject...and he had NO takers.  Are we moving beyond that yet?

I had an interesting comment about ACE Interface...and how it FELT kind of dry and stopped right at the door of resilience and prevention.  It's funny because I had written a few times to them thru their website about partnering with them to perhaps work on covering prevention and resilience as a way to MOTIVATE people to look deeper into the subject.  And reading some of the other comments on ACE Connections...I found Dr Felitti saying that advancing good parenting skills was the most important part of the subject in his eyes.  On Facebook I have been promoting positive parenting by posting preventive ideas as 365 Greatful Dad thoughts...and been gaining some great followers and feedback.  I heard from Dave Dooley of advancingparenting.org who is taking ideas like that and putting them on the back of cars!  FINALLY a way to reach out to people who may not care otherwise...LOVED it!!!  Take a look at their site!

Here in Tennessee, as part of the first ACE Awareness program, not one speaker used the word heart or caring.  I was deeply concerned that the program is called...Building Strong Brains.  I have been impressed by the deep and strong commitment from our Governor and his wife with the subject and have met with someone in charge of some great training for the school system.  Yet, if we don't touch hearts and talk about caring in the front end of our discussions...are we really getting a "buy in"?  We have to present it as the Road to Resilience!  As I have often quoted..."People don't CARE what you KNOW...until they KNOW how much you CARE!

I'm almost talking about "selling" here.  If we don't tell stories about real people and only talk about the clinical side of things...what do we really accomplish?  My goal in speaking about ACEs is to simply touch hearts so people look deeper at the effects they may have seen in their own lives and work place issues.  I happen to be a ZERO...but when I talk about my sweet adopted grandaughter Brogan...who told me on our drive from Chicago to Nashville...before she went to college...with tears in her eyes she told me she was a 7.  She we so pumped up about the subject...and wanting EVERYONE to move to a ZERO...we created a website called...NoACEs.club.  She wanted to start a booth on the quad to talk with students who may not have found someone to care about them yet.  We even posted a song called "Right is Right" on the site for students to listen to every day...about not joining the wrong crowd just so they could belong somewhere.  PLEASE take a listen to her singing this song...it is a heavenly clear message that should go viral!  ALL kids are hungry to belong somewhere.  Our goal was to use this site to motivate students to WRITE their story out and print it...so they could be looking for someone who might care enough to read the story...much easier than having to tell someone face to face the first time.  It's the shadows of fear and doubt that are crippling our children...

Do we have a National Spokesperson that is selling the ACE story upstream to our government?  Because I just read a comment from someone that was crushed that de-funding had killed their 9 years of work...OUCH!  There are so many children's lives in the balance.  Can we work together to Educate, Inspire and Change in our world...so that many more people hear our cries?

I for one am about to start SCREAMING...yet, singing might work better for our kids...so I loaded our song on here somewhere.  If you could share it down the line for kids to hear...we might get some valuable attention!

 

 

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I love this message! And the song! Anything that will encourage children (and adults, young & old) to tell their story is a great idea! I love the idea of having ACEs peer support groups in schools, on campuses, in churches...

It's very much needed...whether it's online to start, or in a classroom... people need to know that they are not alone. They have a voice. And they matter!!!

 

God bless you in your efforts to reach the masses... battle up everyone! Join the fight for freedom! Support someone or share your views on social media... 

 

We each can make a difference in someone's life. It just takes a heart that cares. ❀

~ Jeanette Mitchell

My only caution is that we don't want to cause an us versus them mentality. Those who have ACE scores versus those who do not."

Cathy: 

I think this is so important and I like hearing how others are thinking about and sharing thoughts on this. What I do when I give talks on ACEs is try to remind us all that we are all impacted by ACEs - the presence or absence of them - and so it is about all of us. If we have good health and low ACE scores some of our good health is related that because it's not just that those with high ACEs have higher risks but those with lower ACEs have lower risks. 

I think when people with no or low ACEs realize it's not just exercise and kale smoothies making lives a bit easier or better, but a lack of a certain kind of early adversity, it opens more compassion and even most with no ACEs know, work with, live with or love someone with ACEs. 

I admit that I used to feel my own us/them mentality like people without ACEs have a privelege that those of us with high ACEs do not. I felt frustrated because it felt to me that some people believed their good health was from their good choices and those of us with poorer health (physical, emotional, financial, etc.) just made bad choices. 

ACEs, for me, has opened up my own compassion and understanding that we are all, as humans, impacted by ACEs. There are, of course, huge differences between us all and there are also some not so big variations.  I've come to realize that those with lower ACEs got some things in childhood I did not and that I sometimes want to get curious and learn more about so I can share that knowledge with my own daughter in my own parenting. 

It's a strange journey to be raising kids we hope can't relate to us about childhood and who will be, if we are lucky, lower in their ACE scores than we are. I think those of us with high and low ACE scores can form some amazing and powerful alliances but only after we get how our experiences and maybe even language about childhood might be really, really different. 

AND I LOVE what you said at the end of your post about how treating everyone in a trauma-informed way will never hurt!

Cissy

David:
Please share more about your work on Parenting with ACEs. For those who don't read the comments and go to the Groups to get info. on parenting related stuff. I personally can't take in advice when I'm overwhelmed or stressed but I love positive and affirming messages when I'm in a healing place and when that's true, reminders that anchor my best intentions are awesome. All different approaches work for all different types of people. 
Cissy
 

John:

Would you share the link to the 365 Greatful Dads Facebook page? You can share some of what you share on that page right in the Parenting with ACEs group if you want to cross post it for those who don't do Facebook. It would be great. 

It's there to share all the varied efforts and approaches related to Parenting with ACEs. I'm sure others would appreciate those posts. I know I would!

I hear you about talks that are clinical or distant sounding. I do think stories always need to balance statistics and our own voices and experiences need to be shared as well. 
Cissy

LesliePeters RN posted:
Hi, I am in the process of having my program edited. I will start making calls on Monday for speaking opportunities. Trauma informed health care and education is exploding. From the frontline hear is the problem I see: until the providers and educators are willing to accept their own experiences in childhood, nothing will change. Trauma informed care at it's core is simply being respectful, empathetic and yes vulnerable with those who need our help. If the helper comes in with a rescuer mindset then we only perpetuate the victimization of trauma. I will be marketing my course to not for profit and for profit organizations and to individuals: we need to all be on the same page here. It will be a tough sell to health care organizations with existing trauma informed, even though my program focuses on healing and change. If anyone has any ideas or suggestions I am all ears!

In gratitude, Leslie
6105068298

Get Outlook for Android<https://aka.ms/ghei36>

Hi Leslie: 

If you want to share some or all of the program you are creating, as part of a blog post, with members of Parenting with ACEs and ask for some feedback, please do.

You can also ask for help or ideas about reaching individuals and groups from others of us who have/are or are wanting to do more.  I can't wait to hear more about your program and would be happy to talk/brainstorm with you.

Cissy

Hi Everyone:

I'm so encouraged by the passion, urgency, sharing and work already being done and by all the ideas! I hope you are all part of the Parenting with ACEs Group or will join.

We've been talking about starting a Parenting with ACEs Working group to harness all the individual efforts and varied organizations and to:

  1. Create easy to access and distribute info. about ACEs and ACEs science to be shared with all in our own lives;
  2. Create and share parent-friendly material made by and for other parents, which provides some boiler-plate basics that can be customizable.
  3. Capture all the varied work and approaches and leadership of parent-led / co-led initiatives;
  4. Identify and share what those parenting with ACEs are sharing does/doesn't work and is/isn't helpful. that maybe include stories and strategies related to Parenting with ACEs, how we make personal, family and social change in our own lives and the wider world.

It's all about how we make personal, family and social change in our own lives and the wider world and will be open to any and all parents interested.



Cissy

Go here to join Parenting with ACEs where the working group will be located.

Hi, I am in the process of having my program edited. I will start making calls on Monday for speaking opportunities. Trauma informed health care and education is exploding. From the frontline hear is the problem I see: until the providers and educators are willing to accept their own experiences in childhood, nothing will change. Trauma informed care at it's core is simply being respectful, empathetic and yes vulnerable with those who need our help. If the helper comes in with a rescuer mindset then we only perpetuate the victimization of trauma. I will be marketing my course to not for profit and for profit organizations and to individuals: we need to all be on the same page here. It will be a tough sell to health care organizations with existing trauma informed, even though my program focuses on healing and change. If anyone has any ideas or suggestions I am all ears!

In gratitude, Leslie
6105068298

Get Outlook for Android<https://aka.ms/ghei36>

John, you wrote, "I heard from Dave Dooley of advancingparenting.org who is taking ideas like that and putting them on the back of cars!  FINALLY a way to reach out to people who may not care otherwise...LOVED it!!  Take a look at their site!"

I very much appreciate the mention.  In the future if you speak about Advancing Parenting please call what we do passive/public parenting education.  Our goal, among other things, is get the fifty tips on static and digital billboards across the U.S. on a permanent rotating basis.  We are much more than just parenting tips on cars!...which by the way are wonderfully effective.  At stoplights you can see drivers smile, point, nod, and give a thumbs-up...and I've lost count the number of times drivers pull out their phones to take a picture of the tip right at the stoplight!

John,

My only caution is that we don't want to cause an us versus them mentality. Those who have ACE scores versus those who do not. Additionally there is research which has also shown the relationship between adult trauma and negative health impacts. When I work with a group during one of our Good Harbor Institute trainings after I introduced the research on childhood trauma/adversity I then acknowledge that "2/3 of the population experiences at least one ACE, however; by the time we have been adulting for awhile I believe 3/3 of the population has experienced adverse childhood experience(s) and/or at least one adversity/trauma as an adult". After that statement we then introduce our concept of "Universal Precautions" taken from my time working as a paramedic. Those in the health field adopted "universal precautions" when HIV came onto the medical scene. Instead of asking patients their personal history which might indicate exposure to HIV/AIDS we just began wearing gloves with every patient. What if that is what we do in regards to ACEs? What if we interact with everyone assuming everyone has had something happen that has been traumatic? What if we use trauma informed words and actions in all of our interactions? We could leave the clinical ACE screening and clinical interventions for those trained to do that work. The rest of us can use Universal Precautions always asking "What happened to you" instead of "Why did you do this". 

ACE scores are very personal and could open the door to abuse of power by some looking for a reason to divide people further. I don't want that to happen. Those who choose to reveal their ACE score and those who don't should receive equal, compassionate response from everyone. Treating everyone in a trauma informed way will never hurt.

~ Cathy

Last edited by Dr. Cathy Anthofer-Fialon

Dr. Felitti is on the Advisory Committee for DHHS Office of Disease Prevention and Health Promotion. https://www.healthypeople.gov/...out/advisory/members . That could be one avenue. SAMHSA also has a Trauma and Justice Strategic Initiative.  https://www.samhsa.gov/about-us/strategic-initiatives . The challenge is that they are both federally funded organizations and reliant on administrative support and funding. 

It seems to me that there needs to be a coalition of advocacy groups who are pushing this.  I LOVE the idea and think it is critical to have ACES screening be a national priority.

There are many federal, state and local organizations who are prioritizing ACES and Trauma Informed Care/Communities, so the grass roots efforts are continuing to explode. I see all of these as opportunities to partner with people with ACES to share stories and create some resources that could be used across all of the organizations to spread the word. 

"It's On Us" is a National Initiative (http://www.itsonus.org/) that focuses on prevention of sexual assault/violence in the U.S. It is a grassroots initiative which has expanded. Their model may be helpful in how they are "selling" the message, but apply it to ACES. States are now adopting the initiative to engage local organizations in the campaign. It's a good example of disseminating a message. 

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