*** This is a series of short articles about ACEsConnections members and the work they are doing to implement practices based on ACEs research.***
Over her 40 years in health care, Rona Renner has been a registered nurse, parenting coach, temperament specialist, a radio show host, and most recently an author -- her first book, Is That Me Yelling? was published in May.
If you picked out “radio show host” as the profession that doesn’t quite fit with the rest, you’d be right. Renner was teaching parenting classes at Kaiser Permanent Richmond Medical Center and a man got up at the end of a class on discipline and said, "Now I know why I shouldn't hurt my child."
It was such a profound moment for her that she knew right then that she had to find a way for people to hear this man’s story. She believed radio would give her the platform she wanted to reach a large group of parents and for them to share with each other as well as hear from professionals. Renner was able to produce and host a live weekly call in radio show titled Childhood Matters on the popular Bay Area station 98.1 KISS FM; she hosted the show for 10 years.
Renner learned about the ACE Study from Dr. Vincent Felitti and Dr. Brigid McCaw. When Felitti came to do a presentation at Kaiser, McCaw invited Renner to hear him, since ACEs is so relevant to the parenting classes she taught. “When I wanted to do a show with him, I just asked when he would be in the Bay Area,” she said.
When she met Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, she also invited her to appear on Childhood Matters. “I first met Dr. Burke when we were both on ABC7 TV show, View From The Bay,” says Renner. “She was doing a segment and I was doing one, and we got to talking in the green room. She was always quite generous with her time, and I loved having her on as a guest.”
There were many other shows related to ACE's that Renner did over the years, including sexual abuse, domestic violence, divorce, corporal punishment and others. After learning of the ACE Study and her interviews with Felitti and Burke Harris, Rebber felt confirmed and even more dedicated to helping parents so they could do their best raising their children.
“At Kaiser Richmond we always had the parenting classes free and open to the community,” says Renner. “I wanted to reach out to parents to let them know they weren't alone and that there were resources for them when times were hard. It also motivated me to talk more with parents in person and on the radio about child sexual abuse and other subjects that were often seen as taboo to talk about.”
When Renner began the radio show she was still working at Kaiser Richmond as a temperament counselor and parent educator, as well as with the ADHD best practice committee and the Reach Out and Read Program. Although she loved her job at Kaiser, the non-profit she started to produce the radio show, which broadcast in English and Spanish, needed her full attention. She left Kaiser in 2005.
The classes, the radio show, raising her own children, and watching the stress parents are under inspired her to write Is That Me Yelling? “My own experience in learning to manage my emotions, become more mindful, and reduce my reactivity,” was also motivation to write the book, says Renner.
In Renner’s parenting groups and classes, she often heard parents speak of being stressed out and having a lack of support. That led them to yell at their children and be impatient. She recalled a conversation she had with a group of parents who said they found themselves doing what was done to them as children, even if they didn't want to. Disciplinary actions (verbal and physical) were being passed down form generation to generation.
Renner’s classes, and her approach in facilitating the classes effectively, became very much about the parents themselves accepting and realizing their own ACEs and understanding that there are consequences to how they treated their children.
Rona says the purpose of Is That Me Yelling? is, “to compassionately reach out to parents about the consequences of yelling and other forms of negative reactivity towards children. I was hoping to help parents reflect on their discipline practices and consider respectful ways to teach their kids. I wanted the book to be about a parents’ own growth and their ability to understand their child's behavior, and act on what is needed. It's so important that parents see that we all make mistakes, and that through understanding our mistakes, we can change.”
Renner is enthusiastic about learning more about ACEs and continuing to talk to parents and other professionals about the study. She expressed how happy she was that upon mentioning ACEs to other health care professionals, many now know what it is.
Renner does consulting and trainings for First 5 Alameda County. At a First 5 workshop for health professionals on diverse approaches to discipline, she mentioned the CDC’s ACE Study, and how important it is for everyone to understand that what happens in childhood impacts an adult’s health.
Renner is a member of ACEsConnection and would like further information on how to incorporate ACEs into parenting curriculum, and would like to connect with other people who are doing this.
Story By:
Jasmine Pettis, MPH, CLE
Community Manager
ACEsConnection.com
Contact Information:
Rona Renner, RN
Author of "Is That Me Yelling?"
A Parent's Guide to Getting Your Kids to Cooperate Without Losing Your Cool
https://www.facebook.com/RonaRennerRN
Rona’s radio interview with Dr. Felitti: http://www.nurserona.com/?s=felitti
One of Rona’s interviews with Dr. Burke: http://www.nurserona.com/?s=dr+burke (May 2009)
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