Tagged With "Adoptive Foster Parents Can Teach"
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10 Books About Race To Read Instead Of Asking A Person Of Color To Explain Things To You [bustle.com]
In today's current political and cultural climate, it's crucial that everyday Americans are engaging in important conversations about race, bias, discrimination, and privilege. For people of color, these conversations are nothing new; they are a requirement in communities where experiences of racism, bias, and bigotry are a part of everyday life. But for many white people who have never been burdened by a system built specifically to keep us down, these conversations can seem confusing,...
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10 Nature Activities to Help Get Your Family Through the Coronavirus Pandemic [childrenandnature.org]
By Richard Louv, Children & Nature Network, March 16, 2020 If the coronavirus spreads at the rate that experts believe it will, schools, workplaces and businesses will continue to close. Here’s a thread of silver lining. We’ll have more time for each other and nature. And, at least so far, nature’s always open. Getting outside — but at a safe distance from other people — can be one way to boost your family’s resilience. If you spend too much time indoors, “your vitamin D level goes...
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10 Ways Parents and Schools Can Prevent School Shootings Now (Op-Ed) (livescience.com)
As a parent, I understand the desire for practical responses to school shootings. I also absolutely believe the government should do more to prevent such incidents. But the gun control debate has proven so divisive and ineffective that I am weary of waiting for politicians to act. I study the kind of aggressive childhood behavior that often predates school shootings. That research suggests what communities and families can start doing today to better protect children. Here are 10 actions we...
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10 ways to avoid ACEs (during the pandemic)
How can we reduce ACEs and toxic stress during the COVID-19 pandemic? Many of us are concerned that increased stress might increase the risk for ACEs. For example, most child abuse happens when adults reach their breaking point. However, we are not powerless in the face of these challenges. HOPE - Healthy Outcomes from Positive Experiences - is a natural fit for ACES Connection, We invite you to join our new Balancing ACES with HOPE community . Let us know how you think HOPE about HOPE and...
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1000 TELLINGS!
I just had to cradle a bundle of books when my publisher showed me the first 1000 copies that arrived from the printer. A thousand copies! At this very moment the most important thing is they exist. Not if or when they’ll be purchased. Not who will get a copy or what they’ll think of it as they read it. What’s happening is I am telling. A thousand times over, I am telling. A lot of people already know that after every rape my father said, “You tell anyone and I’ll kill you.” And I’ve worked...
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13 Reasons Why and Suicide Contagion [ScientificAmerican.com]
The Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why, has caused a furor. In the show, a high school student who has died by suicide has left 13 tapes, one for each person she believes have contributed in some way to her eventual decision. Each episode relates to an individual tape. The penultimate episode depicts the suicide in a gruesome manner. Some say the series is an accurate and sensitive portrayal of the inner angst of an individual that will help enlighten us as to the motivations behind suicidal...
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13 Reasons Why & Talking Points for Families (www.sscps.org - Counseling Department)
The South Shore Charter Pubic School (in MA) emailed a letter to families last week prior to the airing of season two of the Netflix series "!3 Reasons Why." They also shared some questions and talking points I found helpful . I know people have mixed feelings about how the show depicts teens, adults, depression, trauma, sexual assault, and death by suicide. For those that are watching and discussing the series and these issues, it seems like a great time to talk about childhood adversity...
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14 Ways to Show Your Child Love: Valentine's Day and Every Day [aap.org]
From the American Academy of Pediatrics, February 5, 2020 One of the most important parts of parenting is also the sweetest: showing your child plenty of love and affection. “Building strong bonds and a positive relationship with your child has a nurturing effect on their physical, emotional, and social development,” said Jennifer Shu, MD, FAAP, a spokesperson for the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and medical editor of its parenting website, HealthyChildren.org. “As parents, the...
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15 Tips for Surviving Survival Mode (www.parent.co
Cissy's note: I love the gentle tone of this article and the advice given from the lessons learned and been there kind of a place. That said, please know it's not survival mode the way everyone means survival mode. It's more survival mode as in sleep-deprived or stretched feeling and not so much the survival mode of single parenting, poverty, health challenges, having to work and being or feeling unsafe. However, I share it for the gems that it does have and the reminder to perhaps try on a...
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Two Decades Later, A Mother Writes Back to the WIC Program She Used
One of my best friends, Heidi Aylward, is a high ACE scoring mother of two. She's also a feisty, funny and has a full life balancing work, parenting, friends and all the responsibilities of tending to home and loved ones. And she is a woman who used WIC . WIC defines itself as "The Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) provides Federal grants to States for supplemental foods, health care referrals, and nutrition education for low-income pregnant,...
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2 Interviews with Dr. Bruce Perry
1. This was shared by @Emily Read Daniels, via Twitter, over the weekend. Bruce Perry back on The Trauma Therapist | Podcast It's excellent and interesting. I feel like I finally understand what the neurosequential model is and how and why it's been so useful to families and survivors as well as therapists. For me, hearing information explained, versus just reading about a concept, helps me understand it better. Here are just a few snippets but they make more sense in the context...
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20 Caregiver Resolutions for 2020
20 Caregiver Resolutions for 2020 Let someone make you a meal at least once a week and that someone can be anyone (including a fast-food chain restaurant Keep a daily Gratitude Journal and start each day with, “ I am grateful that the World has me” Don’t fold any fitted sheets for the entire year, just roll them into a ball Once a month go to a playground with a friend, a neighbor, sibling, spouse, co-worker and ask them to push you on the swing Stay in the shower or tub 5 minutes longer...
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2017 Recovery Month
September is Recovery Month. With more than a quarter of those participating in the ACE study detailing addiction in the family, and addiction commonly co-occuring with numerous additional ACEs, it is important to raise the awareness in the general community about the impact of parental addition, and how family recovery can be celebrated during this important month. SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration ) and many agencies, treatment centers and organizations...
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2019 Beyond Paper Tigers Conference Series - Why Take Course One and Course Two?
Community Resilience Initiative is officially launching a new series of blog posts, building to our 2019 Beyond Paper Tigers conference on June 25th - 27th. We’ll cover a range of topics relevant to conference material, events, and inspirations. In addition to the regular conference, CRI is offering two training add-on options on Tuesday June 25, 2019 prior to the conference: Resilience-Based Trainings, Course One and Two . https://criresilient.org/beyon...re-conference-event/ “A group of...
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2019 Prevention Resource Guide from Children's Bureau
The 2019 Prevention Resource Guide is designed to help individuals and organizations in every community strengthen families and prevent child abuse and neglect. This year's theme, "Strong and Thriving Families," aligns with the 21st National Conference on Child Abuse and Neglect. The Resource Guide focuses on protective factors that build on family strengths to foster healthy child and youth development. It can be used along with the Protective Factors in Practice scenarios and the activity...
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25 Things You Do as an Adult When You've Experienced Childhood Emotional Abuse (www.themighty.com)
Excerpt from article by Juliette Virzi. It has been said that “no one escapes childhood unscathed.” But sayings like these can have an especially significant meaning for a person who has experienced emotional abuse as a child . The effects of emotional abuse can be both debilitating and far-reaching, often extending out of childhood and into adolescence and adulthood. For many, experiencing emotional abuse at a young age can affect their self-worth and relationships. For some, emotional...
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3 Concepts to Help Trauma Survivors Move Forward Into Healthier Relationships
It’s good, healthy and human to want love and seek it out. We live longer, healthier lives when we feel close to someone safe. Some people feel painfully disconnected, and long to open up to others. But then they stop themselves from reaching out. As therapists, we want to empower people to build more meaningful connections. For all of us, healthy relationships matter . In fact, deep relationships are essential to life as a healthy human being. For trauma survivors, the act of deepening...
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3 Ways Emotional Neglect From Childhood Robs Your Joy [blogs.psychcentral.com]
Morgan's note: This is an important article about Childhood Emotional Neglect, how deeply it damages, and how it can be healed. Read full article . Morgan Vien Co-Manager, Practicing Resilience for Self-Care & Healing
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4 Jedi Mind(fulness) Tricks to Help an Anxious Child (themighty.com)
Middle school hurt. Social intimidation, academic challenges and parental pressures all set against the backdrop of swirling hormones and my personal penchant for worry . Around age 12, my anxiety really took flight and started to knock the wind right out of me — literally. The smallest challenges sparked internal firestorms of thoughts that manifested in stomachaches, crying, and often shortness of breath. My parents tried to cleave me from the throes of panic with consistent love and...
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4 New Facts About ACEs Parents Need to Know [yahoo.com]
By Lisa Heffernan, Yahoo Lifestyle, January 24, 2020 Many Americans have at least one adverse childhood experience (ACE) before the age of 17. These ACEs include child neglect and emotional, physical, or sexual abuse, household challenges like substance abuse, mental illness, incarceration, parental separation, or divorce, and witnessing intimate partner violence. A collaboration between the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and Kaiser Permanente San Diego, the original ACE...
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4 Tips for Helping Your Kids Practice Mindfulness [PsychCentral.com]
Our kids get just as stressed out as we do. While they don’t have bills, a demanding boss or a continuously-increasing workload, they do have homework, classmates, teachers, bullies and big emotions. So it helps to have a variety of tools they can use to manage their stressors and regulate their emotions — tools they can take into adolescence and adulthood. Because stress and emotions are part of everyone’s daily life. And because everyone benefits from having healthy coping strategies.
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4 years after integrating ACEs science, Pueblo, CO clinic improves services for families; cuts ER costs, doctor stress
Four years ago, Dr. Leslie Dempsey would never have talked about ACEs — adverse childhood experiences — with her patients. Now ACEs is a common topic. “Just as I don’t feel awkward asking someone if they smoke or do intravenous drugs, I don’t really feel awkward talking about their childhood traumas in a way that it relates to their health. It’s just integrated into obtaining background and social history,” she says. Dr. Leslie Dempsey Dempsey is a physician in obstetrics who oversees a team...
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5 Surprising Ways the Father Wound Harms Women [goodmenproject.com]
I’ve been dealing with the father wound for most of my life. When I was five years old my mid-life father became increasingly depressed because he couldn’t make a living supporting me and my mother. He took an overdose of sleeping pills and was committed to Camarillo State Mental Hospital. Many of us grow up without the presence of a loving, engaged, father in our lives. Some of us lose our fathers through illness, others through divorce, death, distance, or dysfunction. Like most losses,...
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5 Tickets to See Wrestling Ghosts, a New Documentary About Breaking the Cycle of Trauma!
Hi ACEs Parenting Community! Wrestling Ghosts , a new documentary about breaking the cycle of trauma, will be premiering at LA Film Festival on September 27th. The Wrestling Ghosts team wants to give away 5 tickets to the ACEs parenting community. We want the film to promote wellness in the ACEs community, and get watched by folks who would really love it. Tickets are first come, first serve; if you'd like to purchase one after the giveaway, try to get them this week; earlybird tickets are...
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5 Ways Caring Parents Make Teen Anxiety Worse (heysigmund.com)
Your happy-go-lucky child has turned into an anxiety-ridden teen . It is a painful thing to watch. Activities that were once enjoyable are now avoided. Going to school is a daily miracle. Instead of driving to the mall, you are driving to the doctor with mysterious stomach issues. So how do you make this nightmare go away? How do parents help with teen anxiety? You can start off learning what not to do – and then go from there. Teen anxiety can look very similar among teens, but how parents...
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50 calm-down ideas to try with kids of all ages (www.mother.ly) & Note
Note: I usually refrain from parenting advice and how-to-do anything. To me, it's about as effective as how-to-eat healthy advice and sharing nutrition facts as though people eat chips because they don't know vegetables are healthier. However, for parents looking for ways to get, feel and be more calm, this is a list with a lot of ideas. A parent who is less stressed, overwhelmed and feels less stretched is going to parent better. That's good for kids, too and parents can do some of these...
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6 Psychologist-Approved Ways To Cope With Unexpected Losses Right Now (mindbodygreen.org)
The science of psychological flexibility , which is explained in more detail in my book A Liberated Mind , can help. Over the last few decades, thousands of scientific studies have focused on a small set of mental skills that have a big effect on whether people can rise to life challenges. And most importantly they can be learned. 1. Choose to feel. Loss is a rich soup of emotions, sensations, urges, and memories. Make room for them all . Research shows that people who respond to loss with...
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6 Warning Signs That It’s More Than The Baby Blues [Scary Mommy]
With the baby blues occurring in nearly 80% of postpartum mothers, it can be hard to tell whether or not they are a cause for worry. The term “baby blues” is used to describe the flood of feelings a mother experiences shortly after giving birth. Between the sudden change in hormone levels, the extreme lack of sleep, trauma of childbirth and everything else that happens in the first few weeks postpartum, it’s understandable for a new mother to feel overwhelmed. The trouble with the baby blues...
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7 Reasons the Past is Keeping You Stuck (www.beatingtrauma.com)
Excerpt from blog by Elisabeth Corey.
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7 Ways to Help a Child Deal with Traumatic Stress
Traumatic stress feels awful. Thankfully, there are small things we can all do to help relax a hyperaroused nervous system.
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7 Ways to Help a Child Deal with Traumatic Stress (www.attachmenttraumanetwork.org)
Excerpt from article by Hllary Jacobs Hendel: To read this full article by Hilary Jacobs Hendel, go here.
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75 Calm Down Strategies for Kids
I came across this webpage and wanted to share with my parent and caregiver small groups. My intern typed it up into a handout. Feel free to share.
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8 Benefits of Yoga for Kids (wakeup-world.com)
Children these days deal with stress, distractions, peer pressure, over-stimulation, etc., and for this reason, the low-cost practice of yoga can benefit their well being immensely. Little ones have their own battles, races, and tension, and to bear it all, they require a calm mind and a healthy body. 1. Yoga Improves Concentration 2. Yoga Builds Confidence and Self-Esteem 3. Yoga Alleviates Stress (Something We All Face) 4. Yoga Promotes a Healthy Body and Mind 5. Yoga Teaches Body Balance...
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8 Health Conditions That Disproportionately Affect Black Women [Self.com]
(Cissy's note: Many of these 8 conditions impact early and across the life span which means impacting our kids or us, as parents, and making parenting with ACEs even more challenging.) Although being black in this world certainly comes with its struggles, I wouldn't trade that integral part of my identity for anything. Black-girl magic is real. But it's a sad fact that black women are often plagued with disproportionately high incidences or mortality rates for various health conditions, like...
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9 Signs You Need Better Self-Care and May Be a Trauma Survivor
Self-care is the sum of things you do for your emotional and physical wellbeing. Getting enough sleep, brushing your teeth, and eating well are classic examples of good physical self-care. How to take good care of yourself emotionally may be harder to see from the outside. Your ability to view your inner world with compassion and curiosity is one sign. Noticing your emotions and thoughts with gentle awareness is another inward sign of emotional self-care. Knowing how to find and turn to...
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9 things this adoptive mom would like everyone to know [upworthy.com]
Adoption is amazing. And it’s complicated. It can bring great joy. And it can bring great pain. Adoption is nuanced. And like anything else, it can be hard to see those nuances when it's not part of your life. That's particularly true when the media is so good at circulating adoption narratives that are a little problematic — like the baby left under the Christmas tree for his siblings to discover. I get why people thought it was sweet: A precious new life was placed into an...
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9 ways parents can help bullied kids learn resilience (www.washingtonpost.com)
Here's an excerpt from a Washington Post article by Phyllis L. Fagell: Bullying strips kids of their dignity and leaves scars. Some children bounce back, while others struggle to rebound. There is no one-size-fits-all intervention, but here are nine ways parents can build a child’s resilience. Change the narrative Help kids understand that they are the main character of their story and that bullying is just one small part of it. Matt Langdon, a bullying expert and president of the Hero...
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9 Women Who Have Experienced Postpartum Depression [Glamour.com]
It’s estimated that one in nine women will deal with postpartum depression, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention . Chrissy Teigen is not the only star to have learned she had the condition: it can really happen to anyone—famous women included. While postpartum depression is a highly-personal experience and not everyone is comfortable speaking out about it, these strong mamas chose to share their stories—and we can all learn something from them. [For more of this story,...
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A Black Mother’s Survival Guide for Her Teenage Son [themarshallproject.org]
My son is big for his age. At only 16, he’s already 6 feet 4 inches and 225 pounds. As he grew, I began to have a lot of anxiety because I knew he could get mistaken as an adult. And being an adult black male in St. Louis — like anywhere in America — can be uniquely dangerous, especially when the police are involved. So recently my son and I began having The Conversation: What to do if he gets stopped by a police officer. No matter what’s going on, I tell him, stay quiet. Keep your eyes...
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A Brief Overview of Post-Partum Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (mathewsopenaccess.com)
Note: Parenting with ACEs can present us with extra challenges. Being pregnant, giving birth and breastfeeding can all be difficult for many of us. The stresses all parents experience can be compounded depending on our own emotional and physical well-being and the support we have (emotional, financial, family, community). In addition, we might have to consider thing such as going on, staying on or going off of drugs for some period of time during and following pregnancy. We don't talk a lot...
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A Call to Connection: Making Childhood Trauma Personal | Dr. Allison Jackson | TEDxRVA
From: YouTube by TedX Talks: Silence gives consent. Choosing a story of silence raises our chances of mortality rates when ACEs are involved. ACE stands for Adverse Childhood Experiences. If silence is a killer then why do we do nothing? How can community help? Dr. Allison Jackson is a Trauma Informed Care Specialist. She makes a compelling case for, “connection as a cure” to counter a lot of damage done by trauma.
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A Community Approach to Trauma Sensitivity - Conference Tomorrow (Come Say Hi!)
I'll be talking about parenting and self-care tomorrow afternoon (why it's both hard and essential for those of us parenting with ACEs) at this conference hosted by the Federation for Children with Special Needs . I'm really looking forward to being in a room with a lot of other parents, speakers and writers. I'm almost too excited to be nervous. Here's more about the conference , organization , topics and speakers. RTSC's 6th Annual Making a Difference Conference for SESPs, Foster/Adoptive...
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A Community Approach to Trauma Sensitivity / Making a Difference Conference in MA in November
The 6th Annual Making a Difference Conference for SESPs, Foster/Adoptive and Kinship Caregivers and their Professional Partners will be held in Marlborough, MA on November 14, 2017. The theme is A Community Approach to Trauma Sensitivity. There will be at least two talks will be about ACEs! Speakers/Topics: Keynote: Managing the Hearts and Souls of Many, Dana Royster-Buefort, M.Ed., C.A.G.S. Workshops Tackling ACEs by Building Resilient Communities , Renee D Boynton-Jarrett, MD, ScD . Note:...
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A community-based approach to supporting substance exposed newborns and their families
This information brief highlights a community-based approach to supporting families and newborns affected by substance use. MA EfC developed this brief to address the profound intersection between the Massachusetts opioid crisis, Federal mandates for the development of Plans of Safe Care for substance exposed newborns, and, the MA EfC focus on increasing social connectedness as a means to reduce child maltreatment.
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A Conversation with Nadine Burke Harris: How Should Pediatricians Address Childhood Adversity?
Pediatrician Nadine Burke Harris is a masterful storyteller. I learned in a conversation with her at Wheelock College before her presentation for the Brookline, MA organization Steps to Success , that before she decided to become doctor, Dr. Burke Harris wanted to be an author. Only after the smashing success of her TED talk: How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime , when she was approached by a literary agent, did she find her way to writing. Her newly released book The...
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A Cry for Help Leads to a Ray of Hope
A wonder story of the impact of ACEs and how community services, such as Parent Child Interactive Therapy (PCIT), which was funded through First 5, provided the help one mom needed to break the cycle of ACEs. This story also provides a great overview of ACEs and some initiatives in California that are working to address ACEs and build resilience. http://www.first5la.org/index.php?r=site/article&id=3682
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A Daughter's Letter to Her Alcoholic Father - I Love You and I Hate You
"Why don’t you love me? Why don’t you care enough to care?," writes the high school girl who wrote a letter to her alcoholic father but never mailed it. She asked me to share it on my blogs, instead. It’s the rawness of her hurt, so many years into her life, that drew me to share her letter. Helping children and adults understand the secondhand drinking (SHD) impacts a child experiences when growing up with a parent’s alcoholism* is essential to helping a child (or an adult child) heal from...
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A Day Out with the Kids (www.notesfromthelooneybin.wordpress.com)
Note: I often marvel when I read writing by parents who are struggling with traumatic stress. How hard parents will work, how deep the digging, how overwhelming life can be at times. It's not easy for families. There's not a lot of support or language even for parents doing this warrior level work invisibly or not so invisibly. It's rare to hear, know or read anything about these topics and I'm glad this is one place where experiences can be shared. Here's an excerpt as well as the link to...
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A dietitian's guide to raising a body-positive child. (ksl.com)
Preschool and elementary-age children are more dissatisfied with their bodies than ever before, according to one study . Girls as young as 3 already perceive heaviness as “bad” and thinness as “good,” and more than a third of 5-year-old girls restrict their eating in order to stay thin. So, let’s remember the goal as parents: raise resilient kids in a thin-obsessed culture. Your kids will have negative thoughts about their bodies. Our goal isn’t to prevent that; it’s to help them be...
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A Federal Thumbs Up for Co-Parenting in Foster Care [chronicleofsocialchange.org]
By John Kelly, The Chronicle of Social Change, May 5, 2020. In 2019 , Nebraska announced plans for a pilot project in which foster parents would play a starring role in the reunification process, going beyond the traditional role of a caregiver for kids. These specialized resource families, through a strategy known as shared or co-parenting, support and mentor birth parents in hopes that children can more quickly and safely be returned home. Just before the coronavirus hit, New York City’s...