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Parenting with PACEs. PACEs science & stories. Trauma-informed change.

Tagged With "parenting with ptsd"

Blog Post

10 ways to avoid ACEs (during the pandemic)

Bob Sege ·
How can we reduce ACEs and toxic stress during the COVID-19 pandemic? Many of us are concerned that increased stress might increase the risk for ACEs. For example, most child abuse happens when adults reach their breaking point. However, we are not powerless in the face of these challenges. HOPE - Healthy Outcomes from Positive Experiences - is a natural fit for ACES Connection, We invite you to join our new Balancing ACES with HOPE community . Let us know how you think HOPE about HOPE and...
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2017 Recovery Month

Mary Beth Colliins ·
September is Recovery Month. With more than a quarter of those participating in the ACE study detailing addiction in the family, and addiction commonly co-occuring with numerous additional ACEs, it is important to raise the awareness in the general community about the impact of parental addition, and how family recovery can be celebrated during this important month. SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration ) and many agencies, treatment centers and organizations...
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3 Signs You Have Emotionally Neglectful Parents [blogs.psychcentral.com]

Alicia Doktor ·
It would be so much easier if emotionally neglectful parents wore a sign on their heads. And although many, if they are more obvious, like narcissistic, authoritarian or addicted parents, may be far easier to identify..., most emotionally neglectful parents are generally well-meaning. They want to be good parents, but they simply do not know what to do. They do not know that they need to validate their children’s emotions, or how to do it. Here’s the most important point: it does not matter...
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4 New Facts About ACEs Parents Need to Know [yahoo.com]

By Lisa Heffernan, Yahoo Lifestyle, January 24, 2020 Many Americans have at least one adverse childhood experience (ACE) before the age of 17. These ACEs include child neglect and emotional, physical, or sexual abuse, household challenges like substance abuse, mental illness, incarceration, parental separation, or divorce, and witnessing intimate partner violence. A collaboration between the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and Kaiser Permanente San Diego, the original ACE...
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5 Tickets to See Wrestling Ghosts, a New Documentary About Breaking the Cycle of Trauma!

Charlotte Graham ·
Hi ACEs Parenting Community! Wrestling Ghosts , a new documentary about breaking the cycle of trauma, will be premiering at LA Film Festival on September 27th. The Wrestling Ghosts team wants to give away 5 tickets to the ACEs parenting community. We want the film to promote wellness in the ACEs community, and get watched by folks who would really love it. Tickets are first come, first serve; if you'd like to purchase one after the giveaway, try to get them this week; earlybird tickets are...
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7 Ways to Help a Child Deal with Traumatic Stress

Hilary Jacobs Hendel ·
Traumatic stress feels awful. Thankfully, there are small things we can all do to help relax a hyperaroused nervous system.
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75 Calm Down Strategies for Kids

Doty Shepard ·
I came across this webpage and wanted to share with my parent and caregiver small groups. My intern typed it up into a handout. Feel free to share.
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A Reflection of Real Life and the Amazing Influence of People: The Saga of C-PTSD Continues

Leisa Irwin ·
Cissy Note on Leisa's Amazing Post: This post isn't about parenting, specifically, but it is about C-PTSD which many parents are living with, sorting through and recovering from. I felt so much compassion for and admiration of Leisa reading this. I even felt some compassion for myself. I wonder how many others, while facing our ACEs feel the compassion of others or ourselves? I wonder if anyone, while battling symptoms, feels respected or admired? There can be so much shame. I hope that if...
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A Sherpa Helping Us Scale Mountains of Loss & Fear: The Impact of Sebern Fisher's Work

Christine Cissy White ·
“You can recover from all that happened to you.” That was the dose of hope I received from Sebern Fisher during a short telephone interview. She is the author of Neurofeedback in the Treatment of Developmental Trauma: Calming the Fear-Driven Brain. Her book is excellent even if you never plan on using neurofeedback. She helps explain why and how developmental trauma devastates and how it is different than single-incident trauma or traditional post-traumatic stress. Honestly – if you read her...
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Family Anxiety Challenge - Changing the Neural Pathways In Our Brains

Beth Tyson ·
I am a therapist who has to make an effort each day to manage my anxiety and negative emotions. Therapists are not usually open about their mental health in our culture; we are looked to as the expert and someone who has it "all together." But I became a therapist for two reasons, to help understand my brain, and to use what I learned to help others. I find that being transparent about my mental health inspires others to share their truths. Human beings are a work in progress. We know this...
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Fathering as a Survivor (www.triggerpointsanthology.com)

Christine Cissy White ·
We don't hear enough from men who have been abused as children. Byron Hamel is helping to change that. This is an interview done with Hamel by the Trigger Points Anthology website . It's the first in a series they are running about fathering as a survivor of childhood abuse. If you can't read the entire thing, and you should, please read this: I honestly think most people believe an abused boy is inherently going to become an abusive or neglectful dad. I gotta call bullshit on that one,...
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Fathers Affected by Early Life Trauma May Impact Later Generations Through Sperm MicroRNAs [whatisepigenetics.com]

Alicia Doktor ·
When it comes to reproductive health, it’s no secret that a pregnant mother’s choices and environment can severely impact her child’s epigenetics and health—especially mothers suffering from PTSD . But it turns out fathers who have suffered significant stress early on in their life may also epigenetically impact the physical and mental health of their offspring. It was previously thought that fathers only passed DNA to the mother’s egg during fertilization, but it was recently discovered...
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Fathers & ACEs / Quotes & Resources

Christine Cissy White ·
Below, please find excerpts from the fabulous Fathers & ACEs chat we had a few weeks ago. Resources and healing approaches mentioned during the chat are listed as well. For the complete transcript , go here and for more about the featured guests, go here. We will have more for/by fathers in Parenting with ACEs going forward. ACEs as Assessment Discussion Parenting Forgiveness Resources Mentioned Organization: Guardians of the Children Canada TedTalk: Nadine Burke Harris, How Childhood...
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Fathers, Sons, and Intimacy: A Story of Moving Past Childhood Adversity

Hilary Jacobs Hendel ·
Seth’s natural impulse was to shy away from showing affection to his girlfriend. That made perfect sense to me since he grew up with a father who rarely showed affection to anyone in the family. Seth’s grandfather was an alcoholic who punished his children harshly. Seth understood his father received very little love and tenderness and probably never received any physical comfort like a hug or pat on the back. The lack of intimacy between father and son extended back through the generations.
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France's Early Learning / Positive Parenting Train set to launch tomorrow

Helena SNOW ·
"I'm not sure I like that metaphor!" Nathalie exclaimed. "I don't want to be burned at the stake!" I had just compared Nathalie to Joan of Arc, the symbol - for me - of the person willing to trust their inspired vision "against all odds," the person not fazed by the prospect of being considered crazy if it can just help to advance awareness of a new reality about which the general population is only dimly aware. Nathalie Casso-Vicarini is the creative genius behind France's Early...
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FREE COVID-19 RESOURCE: Fighting the Big Virus: Trinka, Sam, and Littletown Work Together

Chandra Ghosh Ippen ·
This story was developed in collaboration with the National Child Traumatic Stress Network to help young children and families talk about their experiences and feelings related to COVID-19 and the need to stay inside. In the story, the virus has spread to Littletown causing changes in everyone's lives. The story opens doors to conversations about family and community strengths, challenges and feelings related to COVID-19, ways grown-ups help children keep safe, and our gratitude for...
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FREE WEBINAR 3/28/19: The Power of Play: Theraplay's Approach to Trauma-Informed Intervention

Madison Hammett ·
Join the Illinois ACEs Response Collaborative and Andrea Bushala from the Theraplay Institute for a free webinar as she discusses the role of everyday play in preventing and responding to trauma. Andrea will highlight how the Theraplay Institute has utilized coaching parents, educators, and clinicians in the simple games of childhood to forge connections and resilience building in the children they support. Theraplay is a child and family therapy for building and enhancing attachment,...
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Going beyond asking what happened: building beloved community

Kanwarpal Dhaliwal ·
“Our goal is to create a beloved community and this will require a qualitative change in our souls as well as a quantitative change in our lives.”- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. “beloved community is formed not by the eradication of difference but by its affirmation, by each of us claiming the identities and cultural legacies that shape who we are and how we live in the world.” –bell hooks One of the most notable descriptors of trauma-informed care is shifting the question of what is wrong...
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Good Parenting vs. Bad Neighborhood

Julius Patterson ·
Hello my name is Julius Patterson. I am currently a intern at Hopeworks N' Camden. I am twenty three years old and i am also a student at Camden County College. I found this article very intriguing because of past situations that i have encountered and i feel like i can relate on a personal level. Growing Up In Disadvantaged Areas May Affect teens Brains, But Good Parenting May Help By: Sarah Whittle, Julian G.Simmons, Nick Allen Summary & Analysis by: Julius Patterson Growing up in...
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Great parenting resource for Strengthening Families 5 Protective Factors

Bonnie Berman ·
Here is a great website from the Five for Families public awareness campaign that explains the Strengthening Families 5 Protective Factors to parents. It has parent-friendly language, videos, questions to consider, and parenting ideas. https://fiveforfamilies.org/
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Great Resource for Educators and Parents - New Online training from CDC

Shelley Rogers ·
CDC has launched a new free online training to prevent adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). It includes information about the risk and protective factors and outcomes associated with ACEs and evidence-based prevention strategies. Module 1 is an ACEs overview. Module 2 is a public health approach to preventing ACEs. Additional modules for specific professions such as mental health providers and medical providers are coming soon. No cost CEs are available. ...
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Handling Your Child’s Challenging Behaviors at Every Age: New Parenting Guide from Yolo Child Abuse Prevention Council/Yolo County Children's Alliance

Natalie Audage ·
The Yolo County Child Abuse Prevention Council (CAPC) and Yolo County Children’s Alliance (YCCA) are excited to share our new parenting guide: Handling Your Child’s Challenging Behaviors at Every Age. This resource for parents and caregivers provides positive discipline tips and resources to handle challenging behaviors in babies, toddlers, preschoolers, school-age children, and teenagers. Each age group page has: tips on how parents can connect with their child, some common challenging...
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Healing From Childhood Trauma — AVAIYA University online course, July 29 - Aug. 6

Jane Stevens ·
AVAIYA University is hosting a free online class, Healing From Childhood Trauma, July 29 - August 6, that features 18 physicians, therapists, psychologists & more who share life-changing strategies to heal from childhood trauma. Featured in the course are Dr. Dan Siegel on "Trauma & Mindfulness", Dr. Jamie Marich on "Healing the Wounds of Childhood Trauma", and Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott on "U nderstanding Unresolved Attachment to Heal From Loss & Trauma." I'm doing a session on...
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Healing Our Ghosts Podcast Series in 2019 (www.wrestlingghosts.com)

Christine Cissy White ·
Ana Joanes, the Director of the film, Wrestling Ghosts has a new podcast series and it's fantastic. If you are hungry for honest conversations about developmental trauma, healing, how ACEs impact children and the adults we become, you will want to tune in. The most recent guest is Sebern Fisher, author of Neurofeedback for Developmental Trauma: Calming the Fear-Driven Brain . It's one of the best interviews I've heard with Sebern (and I've listened to lots). There are interviews with varied...
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Healing through Trauma through Writing & Peer Support (www.grassgetsgreener.com)

Christine Cissy White ·
I was interviewed by Melissa Wilson for The Grass Gets Greener podcast. She's interviewed over 100 survivors and I was honored to speak about developmental trauma, PTSD and the healing process - and even a little about ACEs and this group. It's a little bit embarrassing to share here because I have not exactly been speedy when it comes to healing. The process, which started in my early 20's, had been slow and isolating. However, I know I'm not unique and in general, there's still too little...
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Health Starts at Home

Tina Faber ·
Hello, I thought I would post a little bit about the Health Starts at Home project we have began in West Virginia and some of the tools we are providing to parents. Our project is in a federally qualified health center and is aimed at screening for ACEs in children and prenatal patients. We are hoping to capture patients and children who have experienced 4 or more ACEs and provide information, education and resources to alleviate the effects of the toxic stress ACEs cause. In terms of...
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Helping A Child Whose Parent is Struggling with Addiction [npr.org]

By Kavitha Cardoza, National Public Radio, February 6, 2020 What can you do if you're a teacher, a neighbor, a churchgoer, a coach ... and you suspect a child is being impacted by a parent's addiction? Maybe you're thinking, "I'd love to help but it's not my business." Or "I want to reach out but I don't know much about addiction." Remember that episode of Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood, where he tells children to "look for the helpers"? You can be that helper simply by being present for the...
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Helping Families Stay Regulated during a Pandemic

Vanessa Lohf ·
As our communities struggle to do what is needed to keep people safe and families work to find a new a “normal” while caring for and educating children at home full time – it can be a lot to handle. Child psychologist and trauma expert, Dr. Bruce Perry offered 8 tips for helping children stay regulated in this recent article from Psychology Today . Dr. Perry was also a part of this video resource for parents, Staying sane while Parenting with Shelter-in-Place! For service providers who would...
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Helping Parents Develop Positive Relationships with their infants to toddlers (National Partnership to End Interpersonal Violence,NPEIV).

Pearl Berman ·
Zero to Three Resource- extracted from website and with discussion text by Karin Hecht (September 14, 2018) Bonding activities between parent and child can be a great way to help a child’s development and strengthen the relationship. The Zero to Three website has great resources for child-centered activities to help little ones learn and grow. One particularly useful resource for parents and care providers are a collection of stage-by-stage age-based tips and what to expect as your baby...
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Helping Someone with PTSD: Helping a Loved One While Taking Care of Yourself (www.helpguide.org/)

Alfredo Leano ·
"PTSD can take a heavy toll on relationships. It can be hard to understand your loved one’s behavior—why they are less affectionate and more volatile. You may feel like you’re walking on eggshells or living with a stranger. You may have to take on a bigger share of household tasks, deal with the frustration of a loved one who won’t open up, or even deal with anger or disturbing behavior. The symptoms of PTSD can also lead to job loss, substance abuse, and other problems that affect the whole...
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Hijacked by PTSD (www.parentingwithPTSD.com)

Christine Cissy White ·
This was written by Joyelle Brandt. She is one of the co-editors of the Trigger Points Anthology which is being expanded and re-branded under the name Parenting with PTSD in June. Joyelle and co-editor Dawn (member of this group), will be joining us for a Parenting with PTSD & ACEs chat on June 13th. We'll get to talk more about their website, book, parenting and lives. Anxiety hijacked my day today. It showed up out of the blue this morning, this frantic, anxious feeling that hounded me...
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How a Men's Group Helps Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse

Karen Clemmer ·
By Bert Pepper MD., March 18, 2020, Psychology Today How a men's group helped survivors deal with secrets of the past. When I was a young psychiatrist, I worked with Vietnam veterans traumatized by what happened to them, what they had seen, and what they had done. As I treated these veterans and studied PTSD , I realized that what I was learning could apply to help women. The first rape crisis units and shelters for battered women opened in the 1970s, at which time we also began learning...
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How It Feels & How We Heal: Parenting with ACEs Chat Quotes (You Tube, Database, PDFs, Links)

Christine Cissy White ·
Parenting with ACEs is sharing inspiration, information, and expertise from our chat series in 3 formats. Parenting with ACEs: How It Feels & How We Heal Quote Collection (pdf version below as well) Quotes Database (pdf version below as well) Links to Chat Transcripts and before and after-the-chat blog posts. Thanks to everyone who showed up, who shared, and who is doing the important work that is our mission (prevent ACEs, heal trauma, build resilience). We know that work happens...
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How to Avoid Being Psychologically Destroyed by Your Newsfeed (blog post)

Ann Douglas ·
Excerpt from this blog post, which I wrote earlier today: "This past week has been brutal, in terms of what has been coming across my newsfeed. And 2016 wasn't exactly a picnic either. So lately I've been thinking a lot about the mental health impact of a steady avalanche of Really Bad News. Many of us (myself included) deal with mental health challenges on a daily basis and being fed a steady diet of devastating world events only serves to make that harder. So I've decided to share a few...
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How to Become a Compassionate Parent

Svava Brooks ·
There are many benefits to learning how to feel your emotions. One is it helps you become a more compassionate, empathetic parent. The weekend before I flew to Iceland, I pulled my luggage out of our storage room and came across the boxes I’m saving for my girls. These boxes contain all of my daughters’ art, birthday decorations, cards, diaries, etc., from the time they were little girls. It was a family weekend, so we all decided to go through these mementoes together. It was a sweet...
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The Ten Books That Changed My Life - Healing ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) and Building Resilience

Teri Wellbrock ·
Teri Wellbrock offers a list of those books that had a profound impact on her life and helped her create a life filled with tranquility and joy. While she may not have agreed with every word written, she did find powerful answers, delicious little tidbits, and inspirational guidance within each book.
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The Trauma of Having a Newborn in the NICU [theatlantic.com]

Alicia Doktor ·
When Kelli Kelley awoke from her C-section 17 years ago, having delivered her son after just 24 weeks of pregnancy, her husband gave her a Polaroid of their baby. He was tiny, underdeveloped, eyes still fused shut, with translucent skin covered in fine hair, and lying in a sea of medical equipment and lines. To Kelley, he looked like a baby bird. Cut to her first visit to the neonatal intensive-care unit ( nicu ) to meet him: a cacophony of beeping machines, harsh lighting,...
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The Trauma Resiliency Model: A “Bottom-Up” Intervention for Trauma Psychotherapy (Journal of the American Psychiatric Nurses Association)

Morgan Vien ·
Grabbe L, Miller-Karas E. The Trauma Resiliency Model: A “Bottom-Up” Intervention for Trauma Psychotherapy. Journal of the American Psychiatric Nurses Association. 2017; 24 (1): 76-84.
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The truth about parenting with a mental illness [metro.co.uk]

Alicia Doktor ·
There’s no doubt about it: mental illness sucks. And it’s even suckier when it starts to affect your children. It’s something I know only too well as a mother of two with a diagnosis of recurrent depressive disorder – an illness that has seen me suicidal and hospitalised on more than one occasion. My children, aged six and 11, have had their childhoods shaped by my illness. They’ve seen me so unwell that I’ve been unable to get out of bed, let alone make their packed lunches or take them to...
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Therapy Dogs and Service Dogs: What Are They and Why Are They Important?

Teri Wellbrock ·
Therapy dogs are used in a wide variety of environments and circumstances but, broadly speaking, they are dogs whose presence is designed to help alleviate stress, promote feelings of well-being and sometimes help with a process of rehabilitation or healing in humans other than their owners.
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"They Know My Name": Parents Help Make a Collective Impact

Anndee Hochman ·
Kimberlee Coronado recalls listening to a presentation of statewide data on children, poverty and trauma, and feeling acutely aware of the survey’s missing piece. It was a meeting on trauma-informed care; around the table were social service providers and representatives of local and county agencies. Coronado felt her anger rising. “I said, ‘What’s not even on your radar are kids with disabilities; you’re missing a whole category of kids who experience daily trauma,’” she recalls. Coronado...
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This Survivor is Helping Doctor's Patients Not Die 20 Years Too Young

Dawn Daum ·
Earlier this year I shared one piece of my trauma history with my family doctor... it’s finally out in the open, but I really wish I didn’t have to be the one to start that conversation every time.
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This veteran found a creative way to talk about his PTSD with his child. (upworthy.com)

Kastle created the children's book titled, "Why Is Dad So Mad?" to help explain to his 6-year-old daughter his struggles with PTSD. And when it was published, he read it to his daughter for the first time "There’s a section in the book where I describe the anger and things associated with PTSD as a fire inside my chest," he says. "After I first read the book to my daughter, I remember her saying, 'I'm sorry you have a fire in your chest now, Dad." According to the PTSD Foundation of America...
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TIC: News and Notes for February 2020

Scott A Webb ·
ACEs, Adversity's Impact Podcast: What happened to you? (Part 1) Podcast: What happened to you? (Part 2) Podcast: What happened to you? (Part 3) Family dynamics may influence suicidal thoughts in children Fawning: The fourth trauma response we don't talk about FPs are best equipped to tackle adverse childhood experiences New study reveals annual cost of childhood adversity in California is approximately $113 billion Signs your child may be struggling from an adverse childhood experience...
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TIC: News and Notes for March 2020

Scott A Webb ·
ACEs, Adversity's Impact Lessons learned integrating ACEs science into health clinics: Staff first, THEN patients Launching a revolution Stress is a key to understanding many social determinants of health Is trauma driving some eating disorders? Adverse childhood experiences: What we know, what we don't know, and what should happen next Childhood maltreatment initiates a developmental cascade that leads to relationship dysfunction in emerging adulthood Report reveals link between poverty,...
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TIC: News and Notes for the Week of October 21, 2019 [dhs.wisconsin.gov]

Scott A Webb ·
ACEs, Adversity's Impact There is only one boat: The myth of normalcy by Dr. Gabor Mate Understanding historical trauma to strengthen community Childhood trauma linked to early, premarital childbirth and poor health for women Early life racial discrimination linked to depression, accelerated aging When mothers are killed by their partners, children often become 'forgotten' victims. It's time they were given a voice Children's language skills may be harmed by social hardship Does racism...
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Title 'How To Stop Disrespecting Your Children' Caught My Eye

Christine Cissy White ·
This article is written by Darcia Narvaez, PhD and is posted on Kindred Media . It got my attention because the title, 'How To Stop Disrespecting Your Kids' is geared specifically to parents. Many articles are written about parents but not to parents. And sometimes, articles talk about parents in ways that are so condescending they are hard to read. This article gives parents direct access to the ACEs test and the Aces Too High website which is also great to see. It does a decent job of...
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To Zoe’s Mom: I See You

Rebecca Lewis-Pankratz ·
I am not even sure where to start. But, I know I need to write about this. I need to give this to the world. Perhaps to another mother who is facing the darkness and can’t see her way out. Perhaps she is watching her children caught in the cyclone that is her life. I think she is who I am writing this for. And maybe for me too. I am doing some amazing work with a community that is fast becoming dear to my heart. I look at the people who keep showing up that are trying to wrap their heads...
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Transforming NJ Child-Care Centers into Nurturing, Trauma Informed & Trauma Sensitive Environments: One non-profit’s successful pilot

Gina Hernandez ·
With a lot of discussion nationally surrounding the Adverse Childhood Experiences Study (ACES), trauma and resilience it is certainly a topic that still needs to reach educators and parents alike. A recent survey showed that only 10% of early childhood educators had ever heard of ACES, yet 100% reported wanting more information about how trauma impacts children’s behaviors. While teachers certainly notice behaviors in the classroom, they often feel overwhelmed or unsure of the best way to...
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Transforming Trauma Podcast: The Blind Spots of Privilege and Complex Trauma in Marginalized Communities

Brad Kammer ·
Transforming Trauma Podcast: The Blind Spots of Privilege and Complex Trauma in Marginalized Communities Claude Cayemitte, a clinical social worker and NARM Therapist, joins the Transforming Trauma podcast to examine how complex trauma impacts individuals from marginalized communities and how unrecognized cultural trauma can lead to misattunement in the therapeutic relationship. Using the NeuroAffective Relational Model as a foundation, and his own background as a Haitian-American male...
 
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