By Jonice Webb, PsychCentral, September 29, 2019
Growing up with your emotional needs unmet takes a remarkable toll on a child. Children sense when their feelings are unwelcome, and they naturally learn to hide them. Unbeknownst to them, their brains push their feelings down, virtually walling them off so that they will not be a bother in their childhood home.
But when, as a child, you push your feelings down, you are playing a dangerous game. You are actually pushing away a vital life force that you will desperately need through your adulthood. Yes, you are coping with your situation in a rather ingenious way, but you are also starting down a path that will cause you many problems years later.
Going through your life with your feelings walled off leaves you struggling in several ways. As a CEN adult, you end up with a lack of understanding of how emotions work, how to know when you are having feelings, how to identify, tolerate, interpret and share them. Also, since you lack access to a vital source of grounding, stimulation, and connection (your emotions), you end up feeling, in some deep way, disconnected, unfulfilled, and alone.
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