Over a melting ice cream sundae on our first date away from our new son, my partner and I talked about what we’d be doing if we were still drinking. A cozylooking bar across the street might have suited our purposes. Yet years of partying had shown us that abstinence was necessary for him and best for me. So, ice cream it was.
Popular parenting culture doesn’t have much room for sober sorts like us. Jokey messages on coffee mugs and T-shirts reinforce the notion that the best cure for the demands of our children is a generous glass of chardonnay. Parents who don’t drink are not offered such a simple solution to stress.
Dr. Leena Mittal, a perinatal psychiatrist and addiction specialist at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston, said there is a long history of chemical management of women’s distress. Tranquilizers widely prescribed to mothers in the 1950s and ’60s were known as Mother’s Little Helper. “This sends women the message that their emotions need to be squelched and not addressed,” she said.
[For more on this story by LIZ TRACY, go to https://www.nytimes.com/2018/0...ioncollection%2Fwell]
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