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Facing Postpartum Depression: The Honesty, Courage and Support It Takes to Seek Help for PPD

 

“Nobody would believe what an effort it is to do what little I am able” – Charlotte Perkins Gilman, the Yellow Wallpaper, 1892

It is wonderful to see the birth of a child greeted with warm enthusiasm and support. We celebrate the joy of a growing family, and the excitement of a new life. Relatives and friends often provide gifts and extra help. But for some new moms, motherhood brings on many complex emotions besides the happy ones.

While we may greet a new baby with happiness and delight – not every woman will experience these emotions after childbirth. New mothers need understanding and support for ALL their emotions after the baby arrives. These feelings include the ambivalent ones, the unexpected and confusing ones – and for some, the exhaustion, numbness and frightening thoughts that can come with postpartum depression or perinatal mood disorders.

More People Need to Know About PPD

I started working with women experiencing postpartum depression – or PPD — in graduate school. I was lucky enough to get some career training from a postpartum support program and more recently from the Postpartum Support International and 2020 Mom Project. I realized then, and still feel now, that this mental health issue does not get the attention it deserves. All of us – from doctors to therapists to family and friends — can learn something to help.

Training with Karen Kleiman, Clinician, Author and PPD Expert

Meeting PPD expert Karen Kleiman, LCSW had been on my agenda for a long time. She is the founder of the Postpartum Stress Center, and is a dynamic author, speaker and educator based in Philadelphia. I’m near Washington DC, so I took a weekend and traveled with a friend and colleague to attend her recent workshop.

What an experience to be in a training session with Karen! She brings authenticity, excitement, brilliance and rich discussion to a topic that very much needs and deserves greater awareness.

Signs and Symptoms of Postpartum Depression

PPD is not the same as the “baby blues” – which are mood changes and adjustments during the first two weeks after childbirth. Research finds that 85% of women experience these normal and expected symptoms after childbirth.

 » Read more about: Facing Postpartum Depression: The Honesty, Courage and Support It Takes to Seek Help for PPD  »

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Christine Cissy White (AC Staff) posted:

Robyn:

I shared this over in the Parenting with ACEs community as well. Thanks for sharing all of your wonderful resources and work. 

One note, for others reading this post. Depression and anxiety happen to lots of new parents (fathers, foster, male and female partners who don't give birth, adoptive and step-parents). I say this as someone who was an adoptive parent and had a high ACE score. I thought I'd maybe avoid all the emotional crisis, adjustment, etc. by starting a family through adoption. It was a needed choice for me. And in that process, found others who had hoped/expected this to be the case, as well, and thought it was a way to prevent passing down ACEs, though I called it "family baggage" at the time. 

I was more than a little surprised by how disorienting attachment parenting, sleep deprivation, and new adjustments were even without the pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding and physical and emotional recovery and triggers. I imagine it's WAY MORE when it's physical, emotional, medical, hormonal as well.

It's important to share because fathers, non-birth and adoptive and foster parents (and kin) don't have ob/gyns or any doctors looking out for their emotional or physical health when becoming new parents so it can go undetected for these parents. Also, there are many bio parents and birth parents who have losses and issues and symptoms well beyond the physical healing and those are also often overlooked entirely. 

While I'm not a fan of screening parents for ACEs, I'm a huge fan of sharing ACEs with parents and sharing info. about the prevalence of ACEs, the impact ACEs CAN have (though it's not destiny) on parenting - because that info., shared by health providers, doulas, nurses, midwives, social workers, friends, playgroup members, family members can be SO VALIDATING. It can also be so inspiring in showing how protective low ACEs are (overall, but not always, for parents) as that is HUGE motivation for those of us who are parents. We want our kids to have the low/no ACE advantages that many of us with medium/high ACEs don't always have.

Robyn: Thanks for all the work you do and share on this site.

Cissy

Hi Cissy.  

You are exactly right!  All parents can experience depression, anxiety, and other mood disorders and deserve help and support!  

The feeling is mutual - thank you for all you do as well!

Take care.

Robyn

Robyn:

I shared this over in the Parenting with ACEs community as well. Thanks for sharing all of your wonderful resources and work. 

One note, for others reading this post. Depression and anxiety happen to lots of new parents (fathers, foster, male and female partners who don't give birth, adoptive and step-parents). I say this as someone who was an adoptive parent and had a high ACE score. I thought I'd maybe avoid all the emotional crisis, adjustment, etc. by starting a family through adoption. It was a needed choice for me. And in that process, found others who had hoped/expected this to be the case, as well, and thought it was a way to prevent passing down ACEs, though I called it "family baggage" at the time. 

I was more than a little surprised by how disorienting attachment parenting, sleep deprivation, and new adjustments were even without the pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding and physical and emotional recovery and triggers. I imagine it's WAY MORE when it's physical, emotional, medical, hormonal as well.

It's important to share because fathers, non-birth and adoptive and foster parents (and kin) don't have ob/gyns or any doctors looking out for their emotional or physical health when becoming new parents so it can go undetected for these parents. Also, there are many bio parents and birth parents who have losses and issues and symptoms well beyond the physical healing and those are also often overlooked entirely. 

While I'm not a fan of screening parents for ACEs, I'm a huge fan of sharing ACEs with parents and sharing info. about the prevalence of ACEs, the impact ACEs CAN have (though it's not destiny) on parenting - because that info., shared by health providers, doulas, nurses, midwives, social workers, friends, playgroup members, family members can be SO VALIDATING. It can also be so inspiring in showing how protective low ACEs are (overall, but not always, for parents) as that is HUGE motivation for those of us who are parents. We want our kids to have the low/no ACE advantages that many of us with medium/high ACEs don't always have.

Robyn: Thanks for all the work you do and share on this site.

Cissy

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