How to Talk With Your Adolescent About Their Drug or Alcohol Use

One of the most frightening experiences for any parent is the moment you realize that your child may have a substance abuse problem.

You are scared to death about what they may be taking, the late nights, the change in sleeping habits, the poor grades, or the awful distance growing between you and the person you care so much about.

Most parents desperately want to help their child but they don’t know how. Many feel helpless, anxious, very worried, and some downright scared! Not only are they deeply concerned about the wellbeing of their son or daughter. They also worry about the stigma of addiction, that people will see their child as a “bad kid” and see them as “bad parents.” This is simply not true. Substance abuse comes about as a coping strategy to feel less badly (not because you are bad). Know that you can help your child find healthier ways to cope.

No matter how terrified you feel, know that your love and concern can be a great strength for your child’s recovery from substance use. There is hope that you can restore connection with your child, and help them accept treatment. Techniques to address substance abuse within the family have come a long way even since one or two generations ago.

Helping Those Who “Don’t Need Help” Become Open To Change

One approach that deserves a lot of attention is called CRAFT. It stands for Community Reinforcement Approach and Family Training. Doctors Robert J. Meyers and Jane Ellen Smith developed CRAFT during the 1980s and ’90s. It has just begun to get wider use since 2009.

CRAFT is a powerful approach because it builds on the caring between family members as part of the solution to get more people into treatment. It helps those struggling with drugs or alcohol to accept their needs for healing and become willing to seek help. Family support is more important to overcoming treatment resistance than you might think.

More than 95% of the 20 million people in the United States with a substance abuse disorder report that they do not need help, says the 2013 National Survey on Drug Use and Health.

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