I Have Value as a Human Being


We’ve been contemplating our post-retirement move – which quickly became an adventure in house hunting. Not being as physically strong and capable as in years past, one of the thoughts that kept coming up for me was: “Who am I to have a house of my own?”, and “I have no value as a human being, what makes me think it is okay to have a house?”

Self-deprecating thoughts are, of course, self-defeating. Negative thoughts bring up deeply held emotions of shame, self-loathing, guilt for taking up space in the world, hopelessness, and that something is intrinsically wrong with me.

Why do some people grow up with an innate sense of well-being, and others grow up emotionally insecure? 

The answer to that is finally coming to light for me. Studying the latest research by leading scientists and therapists in trauma healing, I have a name for an underlying reason for my struggles with low self-esteem, and my incessant need for all things holistic healing.  That name is “Developmental Trauma Disorder” –  
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This is very very good and important. All wounds come in two parts. The feeling and thoughts.  Or as I like to call them the snake and the snake bite. The bite is the emotion like fear or stress or panic. But these come with words like  "I will lose my job" or "This world is dangerous to me. " and " I can't defend my self. " or " I cant take care of me."  So it is possible to end the original emotional insult and abuse by emotional release work. But this is the snake bite side of the event.  One must find the toxic self-talk as judgments and denials and release then too. Anthe reverse is true. If your work on positive affirming empowerments ( replacing the snakes. But do not address the toxic feeling the healing has not really happened and the patterns do not really change much.. We what happens is the person will feel terrible and new self-judgment is formed like  " No matter what I try nothing changes."  I teach emotional release for the BITE and judgment and denial release for the SNAKE. 


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