After my first daughter was born, my abuser's grandfather gave us a check to buy necessities for our newborn. Not a single cent of that money went to diapers or onesies. Instead, my abuser took the check and spent the money on himself. That wasn't the first time he took what wasn't his. He was constantly in and out of work, and he often left it to me to cover the bulk of our rent, utility bills, and sometimes even his car payments. If I ever raised concerns about his spending, on expensive speakers or tires for his Jeep, I was accused of being "crazy" or "possessive."
When he wasn't hijacking our money, he was negatively affecting my ability to earn more of it. My abuser frequently called the coffee shop where I worked, asking with suspicion whether there were any male employees or customers in the building. This obviously affected my ability to perform my duties. But his distraction wasn't just mental: He once stole my car for close to a month so that he could go party with friends in a city six hours away from me, which limited my ability to commute to work and school.
My experience isn't uncommon. Survivors of domestic abuse and sexual assault pay a hefty price for their abusers' actions. In a new report released Wednesday by the Institute for Women's Policy Research, a think tank for women's rights, 83 percent of survivors reported that abusive partners disrupted their ability to work or obtain an education. Of this cohort, 70 percent were not able to have a job, and 53 percent lost a job because of the abuse.
[For more on this story by NATALIE PATTILLO, go to https://psmag.com/economics/th...ns-of-domestic-abuse]
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