We Are All Perfectly Imperfect!

I’d like to thank all the readers of my new book, Journey to the Heart, who have sent messages and emails. I’m thrilled you’re enjoying it so much, and it has helped you move forward on your healing journey. That was my intent! 

After reading it, several have asked wonderful questions. Some I have responded to privately. Others I have posted as discussions in my closed Facebook group. But I felt this question should be the subject of a blog post. It’s an important issue for us. 

What do I mean when I say we’re all “perfectly imperfect”? 

To survive childhood abuse or trauma, we bend ourselves into pretzels, becoming someone we’re not. It’s how we stay safe. Children are incredibly resilient. They’ll instinctively do whatever is necessary to get their needs met. 

The “new identity” we create is the story we tell ourselves that keeps us safe and helps us survive. This toxic coping strategy is a trap, but it’s all we’ve got. 

Abused children become adults with no idea who we are or what we need. All we know is how to make other people happy, while we pretend to be perfect. Abuse turns us into codependent caretakers. We secretly resent this people-pleasing behavior pattern, but we don’t know how to escape it. 

Guess what? You don’t need to pretend to be perfect anymore to stay safe. No one is perfect. You don’t need to spend all your time people-pleasing, caretaking, and bending over backwards to make sure everyone in your life is happy. That’s not your responsibility. 

Instead, learn how to be “imperfect.” Embrace your wonderful, beautiful imperfections. This is how you discover your authentic self. 

Everyone on earth is perfectly imperfect. We’re all uniquely beautiful individuals. To heal, you must find the courage to show your perfectly imperfect self to the world. Not everyone will accept your perfectly imperfect authentic self. And that’s okay. Life is a journey. People move in and out of our lives, depending on where we are on our path. 

Your responsibility is to be authentic, to be the person you were born to be. That’s the only way to find lasting peace, happiness, and joy. 

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