November 2020

We are taught to mourn the death of our family, our parents, especially. But, how can you mourn someone who hurts you? For a long time, I sat with the idea that from a societal perspective, we are supposed to feel pain when we lose a parent. I think about the burden of shame from others in our lives when we don’t show up kicking and screaming for one more moment together. They say we are supposed to cry, to scream no Lord, take me, and absolve them of their sins, but I don’t know if that is...

One of the biggest reasons why people who grew up with trauma struggle to maintain good relationships, is because of our own behaviors that push people away. I teach a lot about triggers -- the way people and experiences can dysregulate us and throw us off -- neurologically, physically, emotionally. Triggers are key, but what’s also important are the ways we act when we’re feeling triggered -- or when we’re triggered and don’t even realize it -- and we end up hurting or alienating other...

What helped Sonoma health center staffers navigate one catastrophe after another was what they had learned about trauma in the Resilient Beginnings Collaborative.

As Thanksgiving approaches and COVID soars, I wrote this piece to help parents and educators understand student non-compliance and to suggest a solution or two or three, not the least of which is positive role modeling. Here is the link to the piece appearing in the New England Journal of Higher Education. A worthwhile read I hope -- with strategies for positive role modeling, something we are lacking. As the title suggests (apologies to Pete Seeger), Where Have All the Role Models Gone? We...

I have been thinking about why some heal childhood trauma and some don’t, and I have concluded that the idea of healing in some regard is a mindset. When you think about the power of words and the impact that they have on us, I can’t help but wonder how much our narrative and the definition of “healing” is tied to those around us. Who is to say what healing means any more than some is to define happiness, success, peace, love, or hope? We hold an immense skill and tool to be leveraged in...

( Very special thanks to ACEs Connection staff member, Carey Sipp and my colleague Dr. Andi Clements for their collaboration on this article.) It was 2014 when I first learned about the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) study while working for the local police department. After writing a grant to fund a Family Justice Center, I heard Dr. Vincent Felitti, one of the authors of the 1998 Adverse Childhood Experiences Study, speak at a Family Justice Conference in California. About thirty...

This week I had the pleasure of speaking at the 15th Annual Cynthia Lockhart Mummery Conference: Understanding Intergenerational Trauma Please contact me if you are planning a conference in 2021 whether in person or virtual. I wanted to share some of the comments I received from those in the audience: I loved it, she provided so much insight in how we can help build resiliency in children. I appreciate all you do. I too live your life every day. Very interesting - a lot of good information...

Dina Burstein, positiveexperience.org/blog, 11/24/20 Thanksgiving in 2020 is proving to be very challenging for many families. The dangers of spreading Covid-19 to loved ones is keeping families apart, and many are facing significant economic challenges. Yet, we know families and children across the nation are finding ways to safely create positive experiences, too. To spotlight these efforts, the HOPE team sought out some stories of HOPE for this Thanksgiving, and we want to share them with...

A college student on Twitter shared a pre-Thanksgiving e-mail she and her classmates received from a professor, and it's just the best example of real human-kindness. It reads: "Good morning. I know this has been a difficult time for a lot of you—some of you have had Covid, some of you are currently in quarantine, and some of you may not be able to go home for Thanksgiving as you have family members who are socially distancing. I don't want anyone to feel alone at Thanksgiving, or to miss...

Dovetail Learning has launched its next round of We Are Resilient™ trainings. We Are Resilient™ is a practical hands-on approach to strengthening resilience , designed to aid screeners, healthcare providers, and staff to be more comfortable addressing ACEs and trauma and provide trauma-informed care. The training helps providers manage their own vicarious trauma and provides anticipatory guidance to support patients /caregivers in strengthening their own resilience skills. Training choices...

This week, we are taking an opportunity to reflect on the 400 years of the genocide of the Native American people and our nation’s tragic history of theft and appropriation. Native people continue to face striking health care disparities that threaten their survival and expose our collective failure to honor the lands and culture that we have and continue to benefit from. For more information on the struggle of Native people to protect the beauty and wisdom of their way of life and to...

The Attachment & Trauma Network is excited to announce that our 4th Annual Creating Trauma Sensitive Schools Conference will include, for the first time, a track for parents and caregivers. This "Parent-Track" includes all 4 Keynote Speakers, Special Guest Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a choice of 12 workshops and a special event. The cost for registering in the Parent-Track is $150.00. Scholarships are available, made possible by a grant from The Conrad N. Hilton Foundation. For more...