Hi Melissa -
I agree with Cissy! In my experience families want information, presented in a non judgmental, safe, caring way. They are often open to conversations and at the same time they (may) need additional support to understand at a visceral level that it is what happened to them - not what is wrong with them. They did the best they could at the time - whatever that looked like. Knowledge is power.
Typically I might mention that lots of us in this room have higher ACE scores including myself. Let's pause and take a moment to think about how we are able to be here today - having this conversation. Are there people along the way (that one caring adult) who stands out? *We just reflect quietly, folks do not usually share, but the sense of "US" vs "THEM" sort of melts away.
Another idea is to use technology so participants can anonymously answer each of the 10 questions - and then compare participant scores to the original study findings. Each group that I've done this with - scored higher than the original study. *See attached for copies of the slides.
Afterwards folks are often so eager to talk about their story - at this point we can talk about hope and how they moved through difficult times - and how this knowledge might inform their parenting as they go forward.
It is a learning journey and each person travels this course at their own pace.
Please take a look at the attached pdf document - it shows the local data compared to the original ACEs data. Nine out of the 10 categories were higher than the original research. Only physical abuse was slightly lower ... interesting....
We are not alone in our lived experiences.
I hope this is helpful!
Karen
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