No Working Guidelines: What Next?

At our October meeting, we decided to not adopt our draft bylaws. (Working Guidelines) As someone who spent a lot of time and thought crafting a compromise consensus version for approval, I feel entitled to an opinion on the matter. I'm really glad we didn't adopt them.

In drafting guidelines for Sonoma County ACEs Connection, one should begin by going back to first principles. Who are we? What are our values? What do we want to be? In reviewing the guidelines, I saw a lot of rules that did not reflect the type of welcoming organization I imagined we would be. After the meeting, I thought about the principles I valued and shared the following with our leadership. (Not necessarily in order of importance.) I hope we can use this as a new beginning.

•  Apply rules sparingly but fairly
• Be a source of resilience
• Inspire personal growth
• Develop relationships, not regulations
• Everyone is welcome
• Support the dignity and privacy of others

(Yes, it spells out “Abides”, as in “act in accordance with.”) Here are some examples of how they would inform our rule-making process.

• Apply rules sparingly but fairly
  • Use the minimal regulation needed to manage participation, not to limit it
  • Ask not only what a rule does, but how it makes you feel. Proud? Respected?
  • Decisions about official business may necessarily be limited to official group members
• Be a source of resilience
  • The group should promote both learning and a sense of community
  • Our meetings are a safe and welcoming place
  • We model the community we hope to become
• Inspire personal growth
  • We help all to grow, personally and professionally
  • We seek to distribute power and responsibility, not concentrate it
  • We do not defer to “experts” who tell others what and how to think
• Develop relationships, not regulations
  • Respect and trust is earned, not enforced
  • How a decision was made can be more important than what a decision was
  • We will strive for consensus, but may need to vote in some cases
• Everyone is welcome
  • All are invited to attend, learn and participate in our community
  • Membership is predicated on the individual’s personal commitment to the goals of the organization, not their ability to pay or the approval of others.
  • Artificial differences between participants (i.e., levels of membership) are created and applied only when needed for specific reasons and situations
• Support the dignity and privacy of others
  • We will always engage in respectful discussion
  • Should individuals disclose personal information at a meeting, do not share outside the group without permission
  • Individual annual membership dues (if collected at all) should be voluntary: no one should be made to feel bad by having to request and be granted a fee waiver.