Dear Ms. Pugh,
Thank you very much for your recommendations and compassionate understanding demonstrated in your response to my post. I often reflect at what transpired and think it must be someone else’s story.
After spending my prime adult years ignoring the traumas of my childhood and ones throughout my personal and professional life, I was unable to navigate very complex issues one faces because I was highly capable at coping under duress and adverse situations.
Specifically at work I didn’t ask force my superiors to stop and ask more questions about transactions that were questionable. I thought if I asked for more help, I would be perceived as weak. I didn’t listen to my inner self because I didn’t want to know the answers. I didn’t want to lose my livelihood and too many people were counting on my income, many who frankly shouldn’t have been in my life. Without going through a complicated diatribe, I subsequently was charged and sentenced for said transactions. As an individual of abuse I saw the writing on the wall but tolerated the behaviors of as acceptable.
I am committed to understanding my true self.