Healing the effects of ACEs at home is not offered much as a self-help possibility. What all kinds of trauma stem from is imprinted habits that were shocked into one's autonomic system. About the same as burning your finger on the stove. A shock and pain and fear-based habit is formed and guards the person against ever touching the hot stove again. That is a simplified example of a very complex habit formed by dramatic discord in the family ( ACEs ) So teaching the subconscious new habits and finishing the Fight Flight or Freeze response gives immunity to a life long habit of stress fear or anger that the adverse events have imprinted into the subconscious autonomic habits. So learning new habits and having more that one choice is critical for true resilience. This is ACEs IMMUNITY. I suggest you as the step-parent learn these simple exercises for yourself well enough to teach them to the children in your care. Note: You do not have to go into what the family did or relive the traumas or know much psychology. ( I would avoid that unless it is done by a trained professional ) This is not psychology or actually an emotional healing modality.